Who Are You?

(Credit: Emmanuelle Troy)

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The Pre-Rees for most of these good looking guys have their own real meanings as well:

“Do you come here a lot?” Meaning: “I really want to have sex with you. First, I’ll buy you a drink”

“Where are you from?” Meaning: “I really want to have sex with you. First, I’ll buy you a drink”

“What do you do?” Meaning: “I want to have sex with you. First, I’ll buy you a drink.”

I’m convinced in this club that both men and women know what the other really means with the Pre-Ree questions, and I’m also convinced that it doesn’t matter to either Species. It’s just part of the game they all play, part of the now.

Now I notice two fashionably late patrons stare at my hand as they give me $30 to get in.

“Thanks. Enjoy,” I say as I also notice said hand looking way too glitter-y, even for a trendy Hollywood club.

Maybe these people coming through the door think I’m mourning Michael Jackson.

Maybe this morning couldn’t come too soon as my friendly smiles and my Thanks-Enjoys are getting less believable with the late incoming crowd.

I guess Glitter Girl left it for me either on her happy way in or while she breezed by me on her not as happy way out.

That incident seemed like ages ago – like an eternity – and 2 a.m. seems even farther away.

Well, at least my hand looks excited to be here, even if my acting like I’m not tired can’t fool some of the young actors still coming in.

“Tired, bro?”

“I’m cool,” I say to the familiar looking close-cropped haired guy with sunglasses on in front of me.

“Cool. I’m on the list,” he says.

“Which list?” I ask as I start to flip pages from my clipboard with my glittered hand.

“Ha ha! Whaaat? Alright, bro … seriously?”

“I’m serious,” I say. “Which list? I have four lists here.”

“The list that I’m on! Come on, dude!

“Who are you?” I ask, my voice raising a few octaves to match his.

Wil rushes in excited, looking like he had found a pot of gold.

Right as he says, “Yo” to me, he looks in front of me and shouts “YO! Kyle Dennon! Whaa!”

“That’s right, dawg,” the close-cropped guy says, excited that someone who works here finally knows who he is.

“Dude, I just saw your show yesterday. It was tiiight!” Wil over emphatically says.

“Yeah, I saw it, TiVo’d it and watched it all day today,” Kyle says, not trying to hide the fact that he watched himself over and over all day on television.

Knowing Wil’s taste in television and movies, I don’t think I want to know what kind of show this guy is on.

“You don’t know who this is?” Wil asks me – and the four patrons behind his new friend.

I feign excitement with my eyes, although I’m sure my mouth was caught in a halfway cordial smile/halfway frowning purgatory.

It’s Kyle Dennon!

Purgatory smile remains.

“From the reality show ‘War at Home!’” Wil shouts as they hi-five each other.

The half smile disappears and goes to hell.

It’s now just a frown from me.