You both agreed that it wasn’t time for a committed relationship, so you decided to take a break over the summer. But with school starting again, now what?

What should you do with the relationship that was suspended hastily right before school started? Should you resume the relationship? But what to do if you just don’t feel the same way as when school was ending only a couple of months ago?

Whatever happened in summer, it is probably most likely that you feel differently about the relationship now than you did when school ended. Whether you changed your mind about how you feel about the person, or you simply have new goals and no longer have time to revisit the relationship, you should learn how to master the art of avoidance in order to reduce the awkwardness of any potential run-ins during the school year.

Diversify!

Avoid loitering in places where that person usually has the most classes. If she is a business major, then hanging out in the business school building won’t exactly decrease your chance of encountering one another. Disappearing completely from someone’s life is not actually too difficult, unless you happen to be in the same major.

Expand!

Venture into different friend circles and become involved in new extracurricular activities. Chances are that you met each other through mutual friends or some type of extracurricular activity. If you really hate awkward moments, you will want to minimize the time you will encounter and interact with the person under the same setting. Therefore, it is smart for you to become more social and thus, expand your circle to meet new people. Think of this type of avoidance more as a social development and an opportunity to meet future candidates.

Begin dating!

If you decide that you still want to keep dating other people, you should not hesitate so the other person gets the message right away without the awkward ambiguity of what is to become of a dusty relationship that has long been shoved away into the attic.

Attacking the Culprit: Talk Straight Up.

You probably only feel awkward because you completely stopped talking to the person without any warning. If that’s the case, maybe just drop the person a message, a text, a voicemail, an e-mail or a sticky note if you ever go pass his gym locker (high-school style). It should say that you think it is better that you both resume your own lives and just not see each other anymore. This clears out the confusion, clarifies and defines the relationship so that you won’t need to resort to a permanent refugee status from the person, running away at every potential sign of encounter.

However, what to do if you still want to pick up things from where you left off before summer:

First, read into the clues.

Has the person contacted you first? How does the person seem to respond when you messaged him or her – responsive, irresponsive, excited, reluctant? Pick up on the clues that the person is giving and evaluate accordingly whether he or she is still interested in you. If you do decide that the person is still interested, then you should …

Talk to the person without any expectations.

Walk into the talk without any expectations because you do not know how the other person truly feels after summer. It might be hurtful if the other person does not reciprocate your feelings but focus on vocalizing your feelings to the other person. Although the person’s interaction with you might suggest that he or she still is interested in you, you can never be fully sure of someone’s real feelings. By walking into a talk with lower expectations, you might feel less disappointment with the final outcome.