New York City, you’re SO smug with your quaint out-of-the-way hangouts and clever little dive bars. Aren’t you the impressive one with your four- and five-star dining and chic little boutique hotels? Well, New York, in the immortal words of comedienne Kathy Griffin, “You can suck it!”

Los Angeles is where it’s at. Mofos better recognize. If you want the inside track to all the best out-of-the-way joints in the city, then look no further.

A few years back, I had this fabulously dirty blog on MySpace. One of the cool by-products of it was all of the cute boys who clamored to be my groupie for the night. Good times … Anyway, I actually took one of them up on a date, and he brought me to the Gold Room (1558 W. Sunset Blvd., Los Angeles). I had to laugh at this Echo Park dive bar; it was sprinkled in equal parts with hipsters, cholos, mamacitas and regular Joes. I loved it.

Nowadays, there’s a line out the door at this place on a Friday night. My advice to you is to get in there and see what all the fuss is about. Just drink responsibly, y’all.

The health nuts out there may need to make friends with Ummba Grill (10250 Santa Monica Blvd., Century City – located in Westfield Shopping Center). Ummba offers pay-by-the-pound delicious organic grilled meats and veggies with a South American flair that you just won’t get from a backyard barbecue.

In the summer, this is a great bar/eatery to refuel after a grueling day of shopping or to knock back some cold brews before heading into the nearby movie theater. Price-wise, it’s a 50/50 proposition. I’m a light eater/drinker, so my meal never comes to very much. However, I’ve come here with friends who have spent $30 on one meal. So enjoy at your own discretion.

Looking for a night’s getaway that’s not a boring and pedestrian Holiday Inn? Well, have no fear; Hotel Palomar (10740 Wilshire Blvd., Los Angeles; is here.

This Westwood boutique hotel is part of the Kimpton family of lodging, and the place is a real rock star! The rooms are decorated like sophisticated and chic mini-lofts, complete with flat-screen TV, leather benches, illuminated nightstands and beds that will leave you floating on a cloud.

But one of the best things about the chain is all of the amenities they offer. Some of the Kimpton locations have free champagne mixers; others boast fabulous pool parties that attract fun locals as well as super-cool out-of-towners. If you books a room through a discount service like Orbitz, you can even upgrade to a suite for as little as $30-$50 extra.

Looking to improve your style without donning the same pieces as everyone else in this city? Then head over to Luxe de Ville (2157 W. Sunset Blvd., Los Angeles;

You’ll find cool one-of-a-kind items to punch up your dull wardrobe or to restock from shirt to shoes in an all-new style. I’ve been coming to this store for years. It makes spending a fun little adventure. And you can be a recessionista and still find current and coveted items for men and women.

Finally, if you REALLY long to discover something that’s out of the way and a bit different from the places you might normally shop and eat, try heading to downtown Burbank. Yes, I know – it’s in the Valley. But it’s actually got the same charm of Third Street Promenade without all the annoying foot traffic and creepy burnouts.