Hi Lucia,

I am 43 and have been seeing a 25-year-old for almost five months. There aren’t any problems, and that’s the problem! We are getting more and more attached to each other (a.k.a. madly in love).

We each have one child from previous marriages, and neither of us wants any more. We have so much in common, it’s downright scary.

We can read each other’s mind and have the same beliefs about the world. And last but not least, we have the world’s hottest sex.

We are absolutely perfect for each other. He thinks I am totally hot, and I worship him.

We have traveled together on many occasions and had a more than fantastic time in every case. We also love doing nothing together.

He is kind, very intelligent, sexy, sweet and so attentive in a totally adorable and innocent way. Only issue is this age thing.

I find myself given to negative fantasies about him running off with a younger woman, maybe not now, but at some point in the future. I feel my time with him is limited because I will be old when he is middle aged.

I feel so sad to think that we could be together for many happy years, and then either he is saddled with an old lady, or I get left behind with nothing but my memories. He has done nothing to make me feel this way – he is as mad about me as I am about him.

Should I ditch him now to avoid getting any more attached than I already am? Am I doing him harm by hanging on to him? How can I stop thinking this way and yet avoid getting hurt?


Hi Carole,

So let me get this right: There aren’t any problems, you’re madly in love, the sex is great and you want to end it because of what may happen? A large age gap doesn’t always mean the relationship will end, just as a small age gap doesn’t mean it will last forever.

This type of relationship is everyone’s dream. Tell that negative voice to shut up and thank the Universe for bringing such a special guy into your life.

Write to Lucia at theartoflove.net. Read an excerpt from Lucia’s Lessons of Love at lessonsoflove.net. Listen to Lucia live every Sunday at 3 p.m. PST on latalkradio.com. Remember: Love inspires, empowers, uplifts and enlightens.