One of the great mysteries of the world is still, “Why are guys I’m interested in not interested in me and vice versa?” As usual, it’s about energy.

Everyone is either being male or female energy. Although most men are male energy and most women are female energy, it has nothing to do with gender. Male energy is about doing, thinking and giving. Feminine energy is about being, feeling and receiving. Just as you feel good when you feel feminine, men feel good when they feel masculine.

By now, most women know they should let the man pursue and ask them out. However, things start to get skewed when you realize you really like him. At that point, it’s harder to stay in your female energy – which is all about being patient and receptive. This is when women start coming from their masculine energy by calling him instead of waiting for him to call, trying to impress him, asking a lot of questions, including “Where is this going,” etc.

The male to female energy balance then starts to get skewed. It becomes a vicious circle when women start using more masculine energy, men become more feminine energy. That means he is less likely to call, ask you out, take an interest in your life, want to please you, etc. This is usually when the problems begin.

However, with a guy you’re not interested in, it’s easy to stay in your feminine energy because you don’t care. You don’t call if you don’t hear from him, you don’t ask where things are going, you don’t try to impress him. In turn, the man stays in his masculine energy where he feels good, and he remains interested.

Masculine energy men can only fall in love when they give, not receive. Women these days are often coming from either masculine or mixed energy. This leads to men not being able to feel masculine and thus, not being interested. By staying in your feminine energy, men stay in their masculine energy, and the balance is restored.

Write to Lucia at Read an excerpt from Lucia’s Lessons of Love at Listen to Lucia live every Sunday at 3 p.m. PST on Remember:  Love inspires, empowers, uplifts and enlightens.