I met a wonderful girl who is everything I’ve always wanted, but there’s a catch ... she is in a two-year relationship with someone else. How can I win her heart in an ethical and right way? I feel I’ve met my soul mate too late. —Martin

They say all is fair in love and war, so since she’s not married and you still have a chance, I say go for it.

First, I want you to do some soul searching and ask yourself if you only want her just because she’s not available. If you are positive that’s not the case, the next step is to think of yourself as a product.

When a company wants to steal customers from its main competitor, it provides what the other brand isn’t providing. So, your mission is to figure out what she wants that her guy isn’t giving her. After two years, people tend to get lazy and not put as much effort into a relationship. They start to take the other person for granted.  

If he doesn’t want to go to the movies, you can volunteer to take her. If she needs a ride and he’s not available, you can pick her up. Listen to what she says about him or their relationship. Make sure you never talk negatively about him though. You always want to have manners and class.

At the same time, you should be dating and telling her about how much fun you’re having and the wonderful things you do on your dates.

Eventually, if they do break up, write to me again and we’ll take it from there.



Write to Lucia at theartoflove.net. Read an excerpt from Lucia’s Lessons of Love at lessonsoflove.net. Listen to Lucia live every Sunday at 3 p.m. PST on latalkradio.com. Remember: Love inspires, empowers, uplifts and enlightens.