I met a guy online who lives in a different country, and we’ve been talking via webcam. I really feel a connection with him like I never felt with anyone else before. He told me that he likes me a lot too and he would marry me if I come and visit him.

The problem is that his Facebook says “In a relationship.” He said, “It’s just so girls don’t bother me.” I made a friend request, but he didn’t approve me. He said he doesn’t want me on there because I would be questioning him about girls that hit on him.

My friend requested him, and he approved her. I saw his FB, and there is nothing really to see and no other girls on his pictures or on his profile hitting on him.

Should I move on and believe my gut feeling that he is lying to me or should I continue to talk to him? When we do talk it’s for eight to nine hours at a time.

—Ella


Proceed with caution. It’s great that you feel a connection on video, but you have to see if that translates to real life. Eight to nine hours at a time is way too much time. He needs to miss you and anticipate your next chat.

As for the FB thing, it sounds suspicious, but since you didn’t see anything on his page, I’d say withhold judgment for now.

The first thing you have to do is meet. Let him be the man and come to you. You can take it from there if there is still a connection when you see each other in person.

Write to Lucia at theartoflove.net. Read an excerpt from Lucia’s Lessons of Love at lessonsoflove.net. Listen to Lucia live every Sunday at 3 p.m. PST on latalkradio.com. Remember: Love inspires, empowers, uplifts and enlightens.