With over 20 years experience on the relationship market, Lucia has dated men of all nationalities in six cities, four countries and two continents. Her practical know-how makes her the perfect candidate to dispense relationship advice – after all, in almost every dating dilemma she has been there, done that and lived to tell about it.
I have a "friend" who is a stripper. I don’t know where she is coming from and I don’t want to be a doormat.
She calls me constantly – in between classes, before she goes to work, when she gets off work (4 a.m.) and tells me all her problems.
We’ve slept together twice, and all on her terms. The first time was the morning after I had a date with a Spanish hottie the night before. The second time she took me to dinner and said, "I’m horny, you’re looking f’ing hot and I’m going to rape you."
She always used to say she wanted to see me when she got off work, but always had some lame excuse as to why she never made it over.
On my birthday, she sent me some really deep, cute e-cards that seemed to say she was looking for a hubby. On other occasions, she’s sent me loaded text messages such as, "u belong to me," "you keep hopin’ and dreamin’" and "ro ro will you marry me?" The main reason I like her is because she’s intelligent and hot, but she’s also ruthless and cunning, much like myself. To me, that’s downright SEXY.
However, I also know it’s her job to make her clients feel special, to make them feel like they are the only one. She has never asked me for money and she usually pays if we go out. Although she has many admirable qualities, I don’t want to be played.
Being a chemical engineer, I tried using logic, but sometimes getting advice from another hot and educated female is the best answer! I will take your advice to heart because I think she’s been using me and it’s time to say "Later!"
Thanks for your help. I have been telling all my friends about you and your Web site!
—chem E sexy-boy
Dear chem E sexy-boy,
Exactly what type of logic were you using? Is it possible that some of the chemistry fumes from the lab went to your head? The statement that scares me the most is: "She is cunning and ruthless … that’s downright sexy." Since when did these become admirable qualities in a mate? A hit man? Absolutely. A politician? Probably. A criminal lawyer? It goes without saying. A mate? Never.
You’re right. She is intelligent. She’s figured out that she can do whatever she wants with you and to you, and you’ll accept whatever crumbs she throws your way. You’ll be her therapist whenever she needs to discuss her problems and her booty call when she’s horny. She keeps hope alive (but never satisfied) by sending e-cards and text messages.
The equation of you + her = CO (carbon monoxide for you non-chemists). It is time to say, "Later!"
I dated this guy for a month and a half that lives in a different country. I thought he was sooo into me, the way he was consistent with his calls and the way he acted around me.
He told me he was going to be in town and that he was excited to see me, but he never called. I know that he leads a very busy life because he’s a pro athlete, but why didn’t he call?
Dear Ashley K.,
Darling, he’s a pro athlete. This means he gets approached by groupies in every city he goes to.
Not to paint with a broad brush, but most pro athletes are not faithful, so you really can’t take them seriously. Accept the relationship for what it is or get out.
This is probably not what you wanted to hear, but it is the truth. As they say, the truth will set you free, but first it will piss you off.
REMEMBER: Love inspires, empowers, uplifts and enlightens.
Write to Lucia at: www.theartoflove.net.
Watch Lucia’s show, "The Art of Love," on Adelphia Public Access on Thursday, July 21 at 8 p.m.
"The Art of Love" is sponsored by JEWELTOPIA, 10873 Pico Blvd. & Glendale Galleria.