Hi Lucia,
I met a guy 5 months ago. I realized he was a player and I continued to play his game. I made a little mistake and we didn't talk for a while. After 2 months we picked up where we left off like nothing has happened (we didn't even mention it).

This time, we just hang out but he wants to get to know me. I'm wondering what he is doing. Even though I like him, I don't know if I should continue to see him. He doesn't want to commit as far as I know but he also doesn't want another hook up with me. I honestly don't know what he wants. What should I do? - Elle

Hi Elle,
Like a lot of women, you’re focused on what the guy wants, instead of what you want. Do you just want to hang out and see what happens or do you want a monogamous, committed relationship? Since you were willing to “play his game”, it sounds like you’re not really interested in a commitment. If that’s the case, that’s fine. You can’t make yourself be in a committed relationship if you’re not ready or haven’t found the right person.

On the other hand, if you are tired of playing games and you are ready to be exclusive with someone, then he may or may not be the right guy. I like the fact that he wants to get to know you and isn’t just trying to hook up with you.

You may have started off on the wrong foot, but it is possible that this may work out. Take it slow, don’t try to force anything and do continue to date other guys until you are in a committed relationship.

Write to Lucia at theartoflove.net. Read an excerpt from Lucia’s Lessons of Love at lessonsoflove.net. Listen to Lucia live every Sunday at 3 p.m. PST on latalkradio.com. Remember: Love inspires, empowers, uplifts and enlightens.