Dear Lucia,

I was asked to dance in a bar and we danced throughout the night. I continually walked away from him but he kept coming back to ask me to dance, etc.

We kissed on the dance floor and then he asked me twice if I “wanted to hang out after this” but we were already at an after hours club so I told him I was going home after this. He just said, “Ok, well maybe we'll see each other again here.”

Why wouldn't he ask me for my number?


Dear Jenifer,

Everyone reading this right now knows the answer to your question, but it's hard to be objective when you're in the situation. The guy was only looking for a one night stand/booty call. When you showed good judgement by not going home with him, he was no longer interested.

Consider yourself lucky. If a guy doesn't ask for your number, no matter how much you may think you connected with him, he's either just looking for sex, has a girlfriend, isn't interested or prefers men.

Dear Lucia,

I've been out of the dating scene for a while and am ready to jump back in. Where can a guy go to meet women, besides the usual places like clubs or bars?


Dear George,

I have two great places where you can't help but meet a lot of women. The first is the nail salon. With metrosexuality becoming more mainstream, it's no longer unusual to see a guy getting his nails done (polish is optional). Women in this atmosphere are very relaxed and happy – after all, they're getting pampered – and have no problem talking to a handsome (and sometimes not so handsome) stranger.

Keep the conversation light, don't come on too heavy and casually ask for the number before you part ways. If you strike out the first time, don't give up. When you go back again, there will be different women to chat with and if you have any game, eventually you'll get a number or two.

The second place is dance class. I take salsa lessons and the ratio of women to men is about 7-1. Again, you're interacting with women when they are doing something fun and thus, they're more open to meeting guys. Most women love, love, love to dance and I think we all secretly wish we could meet a guy that could dance.

Don't worry about looking dumb – you've got to start somewhere. Everyone there is learning and each week you'll get better and better. Pick a style of dance you feel an affinity for. Ballroom is always a good choice, since you'll be dancing with a partner and this gives you an opportunity to easily interact with a member of the opposite sex.

Same advice applies here – keep it light. If women start to suspect that you're only there to pick them up, you'll quickly get the cold shoulder. Go with the idea of having fun and see what happens. If nothing else, at least you'll learn how to dance, and in a woman's eyes, that's never a bad thing.

Dear Lucia,

I want to thank you for taking the time to write back. I don't know if you ever heard this but sometimes just by saying “have a good day” you might make someone else's day. By giving me your advice, you have made me feel much better.

Thank you for helping people. You really do make an impact – your words are very wise.


REMEMBER: Love inspires, empowers, uplifts and enlightens.

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