DATING IN L.A.

More often than not, if you use the phrase "dating in L.A.," you’ll hear more moans and groans than Jenna Jameson’s latest film. Dating in L.A. can be difficult. However, I prefer to use the term "challenging."

Is dating different here than in other cities? As they say in Minnesota, "You betcha!" I’ve dated in four countries, six cities and two continents, so I speak from experience.

Why is it dating different in L.A.? I believe there are several factors that contribute to this. The first being the disproportionate number of attractive people here – hot men and women from all over the country (and from other countries too) come here, usually with some type of show business dream.

I had wanted to live in Los Angeles since I was 7. I was living in Italy when I decided it was time to make the move. The good news is that there are a lot of above average looking people to choose from, and the bad news is that there’s more competition than usual.

The second factor that I believe contributes to the unusual dating scene in Los Angeles is the weather. If we draw a parallel between the four seasons and the stages of life, birth to age 19 being spring and ages 20-39 being summer, L.A. has summer weather for a majority of the year.

This has a psychological effect in people where don’t feel the passing of time as much as they would in a colder climate. They don’t feel as if they’re getting older. It always feels like summer vacation – the prevailing attitude being to have fun and live in the moment. This, of course, does not bode well for any type of serious relationship.

What can one do, you ask? How does one stand out in a sea of 8’s, 9’s and 10’s? I have two suggestions:

1. Dress a bit differently from everyone else. Women these days are all wearing tight, low-rise jeans, a small blouse and heels. To quote an article in the current issue of GQ: "When did this become the official uniform of going out? When you broke out this look a few years ago, we were all grateful. But now we’re bored. Isn’t there something new? Like a dress? Something sexy to make us notice you again?"

I couldn’t agree more. It’s time to start looking like ladies. It’s time to start wearing skirts and dresses. Don’t be afraid to wear the ones that go down to the knee. These can be just as sexy as minis, especially if they are tight or have a short slit.

And men, enough with the baseball cap, T-shirt and long shorts uniform. I know the look is comfortable, but a nice pair of pants and a cool shirt would attract more attention. Women notice these things.

2. Have class. This is not as prevalent as you might think. Yes, everyone looks good, but once you look behind the face and clothes, you may often be disappointed in what you find.

Class is a rare commodity. It’s hard to describe, but when someone has it, you know it. They stand out in a good way. It has nothing to do with money – someone can be dirt poor, wearing a potato sack and have class. On the other hand, someone could be wearing a $20,000 dress with millions in the bank and still not have class.

Examples of people with class are Princess Diana, Oprah, Sophia Loren and Tom Hanks. It has to do with manners, being a nice person, being real, having self-respect and not using profanity. You naturally feel good around classy people and want to be with them.

So there you have it – how to navigate the dating scene in L.A. See, it’s not so hopeless!

REMEMBER: Love inspires, empowers, uplifts and enlightens.

Write to Lucia at: theartoflove7772yahoo.com