HIM: I’ve got three questions for you girls. First, if I’m talking to a girl on the phone and I ask her out and she says she’s busy the day I offered to take her out, how can I fish around for other available times and dates without sounding needy?

Second, in a few days I’m going on a second study-date with a girl I like. The first time went well, but I find it was difficult to hit on her while we’re talking about slavery (the subject of the class). How can I “be a man” and ask her out on a real date and avoid the “friend zone” while studying?

Third, what’s proper etiquette when a date is over? What if there’s no parking outside her house/apartment and you can’t walk her to her door, much less turn off your car? I love you, Wing Girls!! ?

WG: Thanks for writing. Very good questions. Let’s dive right in.

1) If the girl says she’s busy, then the ball is pretty much in her court to suggest a date that she’s free. You can help this along by saying, “OK, so are there any other nights this week that would work for you?” If she says no to that open-ended question, then take that as her way of saying she’s not interested. You can say, “OK, well let me know when you are free” and then get out of that convo!

2) LOL re: studying slavery and asking a girl out. That is a tough one. You should pop the question about taking her out either at the very start of the study date or at the very end, not in the middle of studying, cuz you’re right, it’s not a sexy topic. Probably best at the end of the study session, as she’s packing up.

3) OK, so when a date is over, you should still walk her as far as you can, like to her car, dorm room, etc. It’s also the guy’s goal to keep the date going if you’re into her, so invite her to have a drink in your room, or to meet your dorm mate or see a YouTube vid, or whatever. Because once she’s in your dorm, then it’s easier to make a move. If that’s not possible cuz your living space isn’t coed, then you will have to make a move wherever you guys are parting: on the street, outside the restaurant, in the parking lot, etc. Hope that helps! Good luck!

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