1) Don’t try to be friends. For the love of God, don’t try to be friends with someone you bumped genitals with. It’s not gonna happen. You may feel like you’re friends, but she doesn’t, or vice versa. Save everyone the trouble and don’t try to be friends!

2) Cut off all communication. This is along the same lines as not being friends. To truly get over someone, you can’t be around them 24/7. This makes your brain cloudy. Get away from her. No hanging out, no late-night phone calls, delete her from your Facebook, no texting, e-mailing, bmm-ing, iChatting ... etc.

3) Do not stalk her. So you deleted her from your Facebook friends; that means you can still go on your mutual friend’s page and see pictures of her and her new “better without you” life, right? No, not right. Getting away means not stalking her either. Don’t ask her friends how she’s doing. Either way you will twist it to make yourself feel worse about yourself.

4) Remember there is someone much better out there for you. Yes, she’s the only one for you, blah blah blah, we know. But if you were so great together you would be together right now, right?

5) Get hot. Nothing cures the “I’m unlovable” blues like a new haircut, a new gym membership or a pair of electric green vans. Manpamper yourself a little. It will make you feel attractive again!

6) Talk about it. Keeping it all bottled up will make you insane, so you need to talk to family and friends about it. Depending on the situation a month of therapy couldn’t hurt either.

7) Make a list. Make a list of everything that didn’t work in the relationship. There are a lot of things we all forget when thinking of those baby blues, so it helps to have a list handy to remind us of the truth.

8) Hook up with someone. As soon as you feel ready, or even before then, you may need a little hookup. This helps remind you that you are hot and girls still like you, no matter what happened in your relationship. Also, it reminds you how fun it is to be single!

9) Wait before dating again. Make sure you wait before you jump right into something again. You need to look at the reasons you broke up with the last girl and try to repair them before you can ever really be in a relationship that actually works.

10) Time heals. Remember how much you cared when you didn’t win the Little League game 10 years ago? No? We didn’t think so. In time you won’t even care that she cheated on you with her professor, and in a few years you will have trouble even remembering her name. Time heals everything, and you need to remember that no matter what comes your way.

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